30 Day Challenge

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This blog has been inspired by a friend and guru with whom I have been lucky enough to share both a path and a name. 
You can read her writings here.

All too often, we categorize life by the bad things. The break-ups, the endings, the shut-downs and the shut-outs. At the very least, things are “Okay,” “Getting better,” “Working on it,” and, only when we’re too exhausted to make excuses anymore, a “good” that’s come to mean next to nothing at all.

Call me an idealist, but I don’t think it should be that way. Life should be defined by the milestones reached, the friendships strengthened, the places seen, the enlightenment earned, the feelings of fullness, awareness, trust, gratitude and the overwhelming sense of awe that comes with the realization that we’re part of something much, much bigger.

Or, better yet, life shouldn’t be “defined” at all, because “defined” makes the claim that all of this can be captured and pinned down and explained. “Defined” takes life and limits it to the words and expectations that all too often fail us. Life shouldn’t be defined; it should be experienced.

My initial thought-process went something like this: “There’s no way in hell I could write a motivational self-help blog.” Here’s why. For one, I don’t do heavy.  I don’t do vulnerable. I don’t do non-fiction. I do whimsical and out-there and vulgar-ridden and made-up. For another, I really don’t do anything. I go to school, and I write, and I drink a lot of coffee, and my life is nothing short of typical and borderline uneventful. Where's the selling point in that? And, finally, who am I to preach? What gives me the right to share my beliefs with other people when, for the past seven months, I've been stuck in my own mourning period? When I’m just as “Okay,” “Getting better,” and “Working on it” as everyone else?

And here’s what I decided: For one, there’s a fine line between being limited and limiting yourself, and I don’t know of anyone who’s ever learned anything about their fears or their quirks or their ambitions while they were stuck in their comfort zone. For another, the happiest people don’t “do”—the happiest people “be.” They take every moment, whether it’s filled with nothing or everything, and decide it’s something worth experiencing. And, finally, healing starts when and where we say it starts. Mine starts now.

These are my thirty days to a fresh perspective.

And these are the ten things I’ll be achieving daily:

• Show two people how much they mean to me

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around." — Leo Buscaglia

• Help out a stranger

"We think too much and feel too little. More than machinery, we need humanity. More than cleverness, we need kindness and gentleness." -Charlie Chaplin

• Live instead of sleeping

"Seeking is endless. It never comes to a state of rest; it never ceases." -Sharon Salzberg

• Do something good for myself, by myself

"Cherish your solitude. Take trains by yourself to places you have never been. Sleep out alone under the stars. Learn how to drive a stick shift. Go so far away that you stop being afraid of not coming back. Say no when you don’t want to do something. Say yes if your instincts are strong, even if everyone around you disagrees. Decide whether you want to be liked or admired. Decide if fitting in is more important than finding out what you’re doing here. Believe in kissing." -Eve Ensler

• Write here and write elsewhere

"There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed." -Ernest Hemingway

• Make a conscious decision to leave my comfort zone

"Those who fear life are already three parts dead." -Bertrand Russel

• Take three pictures of three beautiful things.

"You don't make a photograph just with a camera. You bring to the act of photography all the pictures you have seen, the books you have read, the music you have heard, the people you have loved." -Ansel Adams

• Meditate

"You asked me how to get out of the finite dimensions when I feel like it. I certainly don't use logic when I do it. Logic's the first thing you have to get rid of." -JD Salinger

And, finally, respectfully stolen from my star-gazing friend and guru,

• Look up at the sky 

"Nothing brings me back to center or fills me with the life of the universe like looking up at a starry night sky." -Maria F.

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